


sunseeker (you make me a believer)

by takunism (weareinnoir)



Category: JO1 (Japan Band)
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, Pining, uhhh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:07:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26922592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weareinnoir/pseuds/takunism
Summary: It always goes back to Syoya, with Shion — it's something he's kind of noticed, knowing  the elder of the two for longer than the both of them can remember.
Relationships: Kimata Syoya/Tsurubo Shion, side!skysei
Comments: 10
Kudos: 26





	sunseeker (you make me a believer)

It's the kind of midsummer night that feels bright even when the sun finally comes down. Shion isn't old enough to drink, no, but his three best friends sure are, and the pink-haired clerk at the convenience store didn't bother checking all of their IDs; he doesn't like the taste of beer, not like Sukai claims to, but he likes the kind of lightheadedness that comes with being buzzed, and he likes the way Syoya's black hair shines under the streetlights.

It always goes back to Syoya, with Shion — it's something he's kind of noticed, knowing the elder of the two for longer than the both of them can remember. He's close with Sukai and Shosei, sure, likes the both of them plenty, but Syoya's been so ever-present that it's natural — comforting, even — that Shion's focus always drifts in his direction. 

Tonight, the conversation isn't leaning anywhere in particular, so Shion pretends he's looking up at the stars — not that he can see them, not really, the light pollution in this part of the city is awful — while occasionally glancing Syoya's way. He comments when he has to, responds to Sukai's jokes with clever retorts, just enough to show that he's paying attention, and lets his heart — he's pretty sure it's his heart, anyway, that's the only way he can explain the fact that it's his chest aching and not, like, his head — float in Syoya's general direction. Luckily, he catches Syoya's eye just in time to watch his best friend bite his lip, and then mouth, _wanna go swimming, after this?_

Shion tries not to let it show on his face that he'd _love_ to. They escape, buzzed and giggling, as soon as Shosei and Sukai get in their cab home.

* * *

It isn't a question of _are we actually allowed to sneak into your apartment's pool_ ; Shion _knows_ that the two of them aren't, at least not this late at night. But there's a kind of magic to it — the thrill of it all, maybe, or the way Syoya's dark hair glints in the moonlight, or how everything seems a little less real when the only other light is the pool itself. They don't have a key, or anything — just a fence to climb and hushed voices to speak in and a desire to get away from everything else, for a while. 

Shion's not really good at climbing the fence, not _yet_ , but despite the way his heart's beating, he manages to land on his feet anyway. "Want me to catch you?" he calls up to Syoya, smirking. 

"We'd both splat on the concrete," Syoya replies, his big smile meaning the same thing as Shion's smirk. Syoya hops down the fence when he's sure it's safe to do so, landing close enough to Shion that he almost stumbles. 

The two of them face the pool, close enough that Shion _could_ grasp Syoya's hand, if the idea didn't make him feel like his stomach was inverting; "Ready?" Shion asks. 

Syoya just bites his lip and nods, his eyes meeting Shion's for just a half-second before Shion has to look away. They count it out in their heads — they've done this so often, the two of them, that words are simply superfluous — and jump in at the same time. Shion resurfaces moments later, pushing his hair out of his eyes, and letting out the kind of full-belly laugh that'll definitely get the two of them caught if he isn't careful.

Syoya joins him, a moment later, his long bangs sticking to his eyes. "Think I can still splash you even if I can't see?" he challenges, his voice playful. 

"Not if I get you while you're blinded," Shion replies, not bothering to wait for Syoya to say anything back before kicking up the _biggest_ wave he can manage. He's already swimming away before the elder of the two can get him back — there's strategy involved in these water fights, after all. But what he's _really_ looking forward to is the way Syoya will definitely, definitely swim after him to plant his own attack. He probably shouldn't always bet on Syoya coming after him — one of these days it isn't going to work, and Syoya will try something else, he's sure. 

But at this moment, the both of them giggly under the light of a million midsummer stars, there's a peace — peace and something else, something that wraps around Shion's heart and _squeezes_ like it's a stress ball — that overflows and makes Shion want to yell into the sky. 

* * *

The idea of Shion having feelings beyond friendship for Syoya has come up, yes — it's a theory that Shosei in particular likes. "So did you two sneak out to make out at the pool or something, last Saturday?" he asks, smirking, as he ties on his apron. 

The temptation to throw an espresso puck at him in response is astronomical, but a Shion manages to resist it, for the sake of not having to sweep later. "Like you and Sukai weren't traumatizing some poor taxi driver with your PDA," he mumbles back. "Afternoon, by the way. Can you get on register?"

Shosei nods. "I'm just saying," he continues, "you spend what's _supposed_ to be guy's night staring at him —" 

"I was _not_ staring at him."

"You look at the back of his head like he holds all the secrets of the universe."

"And it might, you don't know."

Shosei raises his eyebrows. "So you're going to keep looking in case it does, huh?" 

"I might," Shion says, shrugging. "And you can keep destroying the cab industry by making the drivers want to quit, if you'd like."

His banter with Shosei is always like that — they've gone past having actual conflict, anyway, and actually can call each other friends without following it up with sarcastic laughter — but something about _this_ conversation, one he's had a variation of a million times before today, is hitting a little bit differently. He feels like he's one well-intentioned tease away from _actually_ snapping, for some reason, and it kind of makes him uncomfortable; he focuses his attention back on cleaning the espresso machine, so that things won't come to that. 

Besides, Shion _knows_ how he feels about Syoya — he's the most important person in Shion's life, the best friend he's ever had, the place he keeps settling on. He read somewhere — one of the prints up in Ruki's apartment, now that he's thinking on it — that home isn't a place, it's a person; Syoya being Shion's home doesn't even just make sense, it's actively true.

...And maybe that's not how you think of your best friends, normally; Syoya is the only one Shion's ever had, so he's not sure. It sure isn't how he thinks of Shosei or Sukai. It wasn't how he thought of Reito, either, so...

"The grinder's empty, Shion," Shosei says, snapping Shion out of his trance — sure enough, there aren't actually any espresso beans left to be ground, just a softly-whirring machine. Shion can feel his cheeks heating up, and it frustrates him in spite of himself. 

"For what it's worth, you two would be cute together," Shosei adds. 

"I'm telling you, it's not like that with us —"

Before Shion's half-thought out retort can even come out, though, a customer comes in; he buries it, hoping that Shosei will forget before his shift is over, though the idea of, yes, it being _like that_ with Syoya still manages to peck at his brain for the rest of the day. 

An hour later, when his shift's done with, Shion gets a text from Syoya that's literally just a picture of his pet bunny, and Shion ends up holding his phone to his chest, right there at the bus stop, and squeezing his eyes tightly.

And that's not how you're supposed to react to a picture of your best friend's pet rabbit. Maybe, Shion thinks, that if he's _this_ fond over just that —

Maybe Shosei has a point. And Shion wouldn't admit to that, if it wasn't true. 

* * *

So maybe Shion feels a little differently-than-platonically towards Syoya. Not more than platonically, but certainly differently. And maybe there's a conversation the two of them could be having, sure, a _what are we_ or an _I don't know when exactly it happened, but this isn't just friendship anymore, and I was kind of wondering if you felt the same or if I'm actually losing my mind,_ Shion knows. Or, he could bury his face in Syoya's shoulder whenever he feels too much; that's the far more attractive option, so that's the one he goes for. 

"You're missing Miles," Syoya says, though it's not like he makes any move to move Shion, either; they're on the giant chair in Syoya's apartment, the one that's like a couch but _so_ much better, in every possible way, wrapped up in a blanket they'd picked up thrifting that's been washed so many times it's softer than Shion's hair fresh out of the shower, and watching _Spider-man: Into The Spiderverse_ , because it's one of their favorites. 

And since they're so close that Shion feels like he's bubbling over, he's not exactly looking at the screen. "This is the part where he's webbed to a chair. He's going to have the talk with his dad and then his confidence comes back —"

"I can't hear you. You're talking into my shirt."

Shion lifts his head, just a little, and realizes he'll be talking into Syoya's neck in the process, but whatever — the idea of eye contact with Syoya terrifies him right now, though he's not sure why. "He's having the talk with his dad, right now."

Shion doesn't miss the way Syoya shivers when his breath touches his neck, but his best friend straightens a little and manages to say words. "If you want to watch something else, I've got a bunch of other DVDs —"

"That's not it. Just let me do this for a while," Shion says, re-burying himself and exhaling. "I'm still watching. I'm not gonna miss the _What's Up Danger_ part."

"Okay," Syoya says, quietly, as the movie continues. His hand ends up tangling in Shion's hair at some point, as casually as he would open a fridge or put on a shirt, and Shion snuggles closer, letting the warmth envelop him. 

(It's only when the movie's over, and Syoya's fast asleep, glasses askew and his hand still moving around in Shion's hair, that Shion realizes precisely how _fucked_ he is.)

* * *

"I think I'm a little bit in love with Syoya," Shion says, apropos of nothing. 

Sukai puts down the Joy-Con — allowing Shion to _totally_ kick Wolf's ass off the stage, ha — and takes out his phone, quickly tapping out a LINE message. "I had it on Syoya figuring it out first, asshole," he says, sighing. "Also, did you seriously just —"

"All's fair in love and Smash," Shion says, sticking his tongue out. "Who'd you bet with — wait, you bet on me?"

"Me and Shosei have had this going since... maybe our freshman year?" Sukai replies. "You guys just... orbit each other. It was bound to happen at some point."

"Orbit each other," Shion repeats. "Is that an astronomy major joke that I'm too stupid to understand?"

"Like you're affected by his gravity," Sukai explains. "I don't know if there's a better metaphor for it. It isn't even just that you're always around him — 'cause you totally are — but it's like... you affect each other. He's the tides and you're the moon."

What Shion _wants_ to say is something snarky — a _wow, you've spent more time thinking about this than I have, haven't you,_ though he isn't really sure if that's true anymore — but instead, his voice ends up breaking. "I didn't think of it like that," he manages. 

"When are you going to tell him?" Sukai asks, then.

"Tell him what?" Shion replies — he might as well be purposefully oblivious. Maybe it'll make his brains stop falling out of his ears. 

"That you're an asshole that cheats at Smash. No, that you're into him," Sukai says — well, there goes _that_ plan, Shion thinks.

It takes a moment for Shion to reply, after that. "You think I should?"

"I really don't think it would change much," Sukai says. "You're like a binary star system."

"...Yes, and I know what that means."

"It means — to the untrained eye, you're already one unit, and it's only through other means one would find out that you're not."

"You could just say that other people think me and Syoya are... not just friends," Shion tries. (That doesn't sound quite right — but neither does _dating_ or _boyfriends_ or anything along those lines, either.) "You can just use words that people understand."

"I'll start when you tell Syoya."

"I'll tell Syoya when you beat me in Smash."

"So in about three minutes, assuming you play fair?" Sukai asks, smirking. 

"You're flattering yourself," Shion says, focusing his attention back to Sukai's TV. He can go a few rounds at Smash and forget things — or that's what he hopes for, anyway.

* * *

 _Binary stars._

Shion looks up what that means a day later. Two stars, rotating around the same point — it kind of fits him and Syoya, he supposes. He reads about how orbital periods of those two stars can be years and years, or less than an hour. There's a hot one in the pair, and a cold one, even though they're both stars, so obviously they're burning hotter than Shion can fathom, and they just _rotate_ around each other. It's wild. 

He sits back in his desk and sighs — he's always been more interested in the sci-fi side of space, but he'll be damned if it's not kind of an apt metaphor. He, at least, doesn't mind being in Syoya's pull — he likes it a lot. Loves it, maybe, even; could turn into loving it, at the very least. And since Shion has already figured out that, yes, he's got a gross, disgusting crush on his best friend, it's not really an earth-shattering revelation, like he thought it would maybe be. 

It's the idea of Syoya orbiting right back that makes Shion's shoulders shake. He _tries_ not to be hyper aware of the way Syoya bites his bottom lip when he's nervous, but it happens around Shion so _often_ that he's _gotta_ wonder if it means something. Syoya's just as comfortable around Shion as Shion is around Syoya — unless he's not, and Shion's been reading their entire relationship wrong, which is maybe possible. (That idea makes Shion draw his knees into his chest, under his hoodie. It sends a genuine, honest-to-god chill down his spine.)

He's going to have to figure out _some_ way to suss out Syoya's feelings. He's not going to say it directly — the idea makes Shion's stomach flip — but he'll figure something out, if only for the sake of his own sanity. He's not sure how much longer he can go before his heart overflows.

* * *

It isn't like they've kissed, or anything, as cuddly as the two of them are, but it's not like Shion hasn't thought about it, either. He's maybe thought about it too much, even; it's something his mind defaults back to, one of the many Syoya topics that comes up like clockwork, now that he's realized exactly how he feels. And something like that — an affectionate gesture that could be read as just friends, _maybe_ — is the safest thing Shion can see himself actually managing to do. 

It can't be on the lips. Even if it's just a peck, there aren't many platonic ways of kissing someone on the lips, and since Shion's still telling himself that his feelings for Syoya are no more than just strong friendship, that won't do. It's true that his eyes often end up drifting in that direction — though he always manages to look away before he's caught, he's pretty sure — but he throws the suggestion of a kiss on the lips out of the window as soon as it enters his mind. 

The _cheek_ , though... strangely, that doesn't feel intimate _enough_ ; Shion has purikura photos of him and Reito, who he hasn't even talked to in a long, long time, smooching each other's cheeks like it's nothing. The forehead wouldn't work, either; Syoya's bangs are in the way.

So he decides on the shoulder. It's clothed. There's cloth over it. And Syoya's not up to anything specific — he's kind of idly looking in the refrigerator as if more food will appear if he looks hard enough. "We should get noodles," Syoya calls, loud enough that he'll definitely be heard from where Shion's sitting. 

"Noodles sounds good," Shion calls back, standing up and walking behind Syoya. He doesn't go in for the kiss — not yet, anyway. "Do we have anything to drink?"

"Uh, beer you took from Ruki's place last time you were there?"

"So yes." Shion smirks. "Kinda funny how it ended up in your refrigerator, huh?"

"You spend so much time at my place that I kind of wonder if you know what grocery stores look like," Syoya replies, turning around — _oh_ , the two of them are really close, all of a sudden, and Shion takes a step back. His plan had kind of relied on Syoya being turned around, and now they're face to face; his nervousness must _show_ , because Syoya's face falls. "Are you okay?" he asks, voice soft.

Shion pauses for _way_ too long, looking into Syoya's eyes — maybe the secrets of the universe _are_ in there, actually — and knows the moment's awkward before he knows what to say next. "I'm... I'm okay."

Syoya bites his lip. "If you —"

"Are you nervous... around me?" Shion asks, suddenly, the words coming up like fireworks. "You bite your lip when you're nervous and — and I noticed."

Syoya's the one that ends up breaking eye contact, suddenly fixing his gaze on the collar of Shion's t-shirt. He doesn't really have room to move away, not unless he's somehow gained the ability to merge with his refrigerator, so Shion takes a step back; to his surprise, Syoya takes a step forward in response. "Nervous... makes it sound worse than it is," he says, finally. "Nervous sounds bad."

"Then what word would you use?" Shion asks, voice dropping in volume. He has the urge to hold on to Syoya, somehow, so Shion takes his thumb in his hand, as gently as he can manage. 

"...More like... likestruck?" Syoya answers; there's a dusting of pink on his cheeks and a _god, you're so cute_ that dies in Shion's throat. "Like I get all... flustered trying to act the way I usually do around you. I don't want things to change."

"I don't think they would," Shion says. "Not that much. I've been thinking about it — and I spend all my time with you anyway and fucking Sukai and Shosei _bet_ on it —"

"They did?"

"That I'd figure this out before you did," Shion says. "But the point is — if I still get to be your best friend but I can kiss you or whatever, that would be nice."

Syoya glances up, his eyes meeting Shion's again; the spark of hope, hope and what's probably affection, Shion realizes, makes his heart thump so hard that it must be audible. "I think so, too," Syoya says, the corners of his mouth lifting. "Do you wanna... try that out, maybe?"

Shion's throat suddenly feels dry, but since his answer is a big, big yes, he nods. The noodles get ordered eventually, but Shion's fine with a different kind of fulfillment as Syoya's lips press against his. _We should've started doing this sooner,_ he thinks, trying not to giggle as he kisses Syoya back. 

* * *

(The next time Shion has a day off, he and Syoya visit the cafe anyway. When Shosei sighs and hands a crisp 5000 yen bill to Sukai as they walk in, holding hands — "I thought you guys were gonna pine for at least another week," he says, pouting — the both of them can't help but laugh.)

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday i hope u like this cause that sure would make one of us :')
> 
> title from the naked and famous's sunseeker
> 
> come bother me on twitter for being bad at writing: @jo1taku


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